27 March 2014

The Other Victims of Deportation

When someone is deported, they are usually not the only victims. In the first six months of June 2012, around 45,000 parents of US-Citizen children were deported. Every day, families all across the Greatest Country in the World are being ripped apart. Parents are being whisked away from their children. It's a horrible, sad, and terrifying life event that permanently changes the child for life.

But besides spouses and children, there are other victims as well. When a family member is deported, that wind rustles all of the leaves on the family tree. For instance, in our family, there are other victims besides my children and I. There's this guy:

And this lady:

That's right. My mom and dad. I love these two people and without them, I don't think I could have ever survived on my own. The kids and I have had to live with them since the deportation, and their generosity and tolerance for me and my ways have been my only lifeline when I was drowning in the sea of despair. I will never be able to pay them back for all of the help they've given me, financially as well as emotionally. 

When Hector was first deported, my mom took out a cash advance on her credit card to help him. She took us in, helped me get a job, watches my kids when I've worked doubles or weekends, feeds my daughter's never-ending shoe obsession, and bought my son more cars for his collection than there are in a Ford factory.

But my Daddy...

My Daddy Fell and broke his arm :( February 2011

My dad rigged a platform onto his wheelchair so that Isaias and Cecilia could both ride on it. 
My Daddy and Isaias have been best buddies since the day Isaias was born. As a surprise to my dad, I named my son Isaias Derald, after him of course, because I'm the biggest Daddy's Girl on Planet Earth. It melted my Daddy's heart. When we moved back in with my parents, we began to notice that my son is actually a miniature version of my Dad, and he began to follow his Papa around. For 3 years, he's been Grandpa's boy. 

So, now Isaias is in Mexico. My dad is lost without his grandson. My mom is lost, but she is resilient and still has distractions in her life to keep her mind on other things. But my Daddy is sad and misses his grandson. And the thought of us moving to Mexico has caused a depression in him that is excruciating to see. 

Hector, Isaias, and my Dad have all had to fight to be the man in my life, and I really wish my dad would come with us. I've stayed for so long out of fear, but also because my dad is aging quickly and is getting frail. But for 80 years now, the USA has been his home. He served in the Navy for this country. He is a Proud American. But even the Proudest American has been touched by deportation and realizes that it hurts everyone.

1 comment:

  1. Andrea, I'm trying to scrapbook here and it's hard to do so through the tears in my eyes. I was that Proud American serving my country too but I lost that. Now I'm just thankful that any other country out there will welcome us all together with open arms. My husband loves my country more than I do now. My mother quit her job to raise my two girls when I shipped to Iraq for a year and yes, it ripped out her heart when we moved to Mexico. We got to see them via Skype while we were in DF and we all cried like babies. I don't know if the pain of separation will ever lessen. I know that a year away from my family was just as hard in the end as it was in the beginning. Any chance your parents can make the move to a border town if they can survive off SSA? I know my mom would move to the hated Southern California again if it meant seeing my children on a weekly basis.